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Conscientious ISP "process servers" - charge RIAA mafia for service on customer

>From this slashdot article:

(which subject title is deceptive, what's new on slashdot eh)

comes this little comment conversation:

I'd like to elaborate on your good advice:

Downloading torrents isn't a crime. It's a civil matter, there is no
reason you can't contact police, however the precautions that make a
site immune to civil action happen to make them difficult to pursue in
criminal cases as well.

The argument could be made that their advertising revenues discourage
them from displaying malvertisements, however the short lifecycle of a
modern torrent site results in little incentive to do anything but
maximize revenues before the guillotine drops. So in practice: turn
off your javascript and assuming they are using l337 zero-day hacks on
your browser's incognito mode...

Felderal law says you're wrong.

I gotta love the "what I do is not illegal!!!" downloaders who can't
be bothered to actually check the laws before giving bad, bad,
rationalizations for their behavior.

They send tons of emails to us. We contact them to pay to be their
process server and they hang up the phone. Piracy is when someone
makes copies and sells them. So far no bottom dwelling copyright
spammer has agreed to pay for us to deliver their letter. We have
never received a single subpoena. They think we have to do it for free
here in the land of the fee. Even if one finally did buck up and pay
for us to deliver them they would still be handled as a civil suit.
Feel free to shill away how wrong I am but I have real world knowledge
about how cheap these bottom feeders are.