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[mob] Help choose the official Mob presidential candidate!
Who will the Mob list endorse for president in 2004? Here are some of
the frontrunners. What do YOU think?
-Mr. Warren Roderick Ashe (D)
Mr. Ashe is obviously an immensely qualified candidate, having served in
the Army, Navy, and Air Force (occasionally at the same time!). He was
president of the United Nations from 1973-2003, the appointed President
of the United States White House from 1981-2003, and Vice President of
the West Wing for the Carter and Ford administrations. He supports
higher levels of funding for saucer research, and says that he has
"poetry, music, television publications that have remained a publication
secret in Radio and television broadcasting".
-Henri Calitri (I)
Mr. Caltriti, a tow truck operator, has big plans for America. He says
"My political party believes in expressing as many laws to put forth as
can possibly be conceived ... My dreams consist of forming a unit
composed of a modern couple who will assimilate information on the magic
techniques of penis enlargement through articles in popular magazines
and medical journals ... I am looking forward to creating a large
research office in discovering immortality for a human being to live
till the age of 925 years ... At this time, I believe that I must become
the President of the United States of America, or something similar, to
be able to effectively do this. I want human beings to survive, most
certainly on earth, as a beautiful organism, in sync with all aliens
also living in this zone of space, occuring in the dimension [of] Hell."
An academic in the tow truck industry, he has published a paper
detailing how tow trucks would have been useful to the Egyptians during
the building of the great pyramids. (paper is here:
http://www.towman.com/bestofat_aug15.htm ). It is unknown if the paper
was peer reviewed or not.
-Ms. Albertha Moultrie Brinson (R)
Running as a Republican, Ms. Brinson says she will be "the Republican
[Presidential] challenger to the Rev. Al Sharpton."
-Jack Grimes (UFU)
Mr. Grimes is the leader and probably founder of the 'United Fascist
Union" and his party platform aims to "institute a military dictatorship
form of government over the Earth." Check out the pictures, speeches,
and discussion sections of his web site.
-Andisheh Nouraee (I)
Mr. Nouraee writes for Creative Loafing here in Atlanta. His campaign
slogans include: "I'm SO F***ing President" and "Putting the 'vice' back
-Da Vid (LP)
Mr. Vid leads the Light Party whose members recieve "a CD of New Age
music and a music video" designed to inspire, delight, heal &
enlighten"" when they join.
You can find a full list of ALL the 2004 candidates with additional
information at http://www.politics1.com/p2004.htm